A story from Jenna Trubiano highlights the festering of misogyny in hockey, the men's team rides one rivalry sweep into another featuring the Duel in the D, WoHo starts a three-game win streak
I’m surprised by your article about Jenna Trubiano. I have to say that I’m not convinced, based on her story, that misogyny is as wide spread in hockey as you make it seem based on this incident. I think you have greatly extrapolated one alleged event into what you perceive now as something that is deeply ingrained in the culture of hockey. I certainly don’t agree and wouldn’t go up to all or any of the Michigan hockey players with the assumption that they are misogynistic. That’s what your article seems to be begetting.
Anecdotally, I believe many hockey players have great respect for women, which most likely stems from the great amount of effort their mothers put forth in getting them to where they are today. These women are referred to as “hockey moms” and this nickname symbolizes mothers that have dedicated their time and effort to getting their kids to practice and games at odd hours. And these hockey players realize this. Now back to your article.
It seems to me that Ms. Trubiano is using this story more as impugnation than education. In fact, basically forcing someone to have to apologize to her is not educational at all and does not lead to heart-felt changes in attitude. It usually leads to the exact opposite. Someone basically demanding an apology in order to educate is the height of condescension. Ms. Trubiano’s knowledge of human nature seems to be quite modest in this respect.
Furthermore, anyone who has played sports knows that trash talk is often part of the game. With your coverage of Michigan hockey, you should be well aware of the “you suck” chant that gets forcefully yelled at the opposition’s goalie. The goal (no pun intended), of course, is to get under the other person’s skin. In the case of Ms. Trubiano, mission accomplished. Whoever said this, if it was said at all, got her into an emotional state that is not conducive to playing sports. Again, that’s part of the game. Players are often called whiners, babies, and much much worse, and told “they suck” so often that the sport would be riddled with requests for apologies if people let it get to them or made them emotional. The fact that she’s a head coach now and has to deal with young players who need to be in control of their emotions makes me concerned.
You indicate that you have admiration for Ms. Trubiano for sharing this story. And I would too, if Ms. Trubiano had shared this story in the 70’s. However, in today’s world, she’s more likely to get condolences and admiration (as in your article) for sharing a story like this that claims she’s a victim.
I’m amazed at your indication that misogyny is so ingrained in the sport that when Gary Bettman indicates that an incident is not typical of NHL players, you dismiss it out of hand by indicating that it is simply denial. People like you were also very quick to extrapolate stories about Duke Lacrosse or UVA fraternities into widespread claims of severe abuse by specific identities and that the alleged actions that were proven false seem to be happening everywhere and are ingrained. I’m not saying that Ms. Trubiano’s story is in the same category as Duke Lacrosse or the UVA stories, but perhaps we might want to have some perspective here before cursing an entire sport based on two stories.
I could write more but I hope I’ve written enough to hopefully help educate you (sorry…couldn’t resist). I do like your blog Sam but this isn’t really about hockey but is about something else entirely.
Hi Sam:
I’m surprised by your article about Jenna Trubiano. I have to say that I’m not convinced, based on her story, that misogyny is as wide spread in hockey as you make it seem based on this incident. I think you have greatly extrapolated one alleged event into what you perceive now as something that is deeply ingrained in the culture of hockey. I certainly don’t agree and wouldn’t go up to all or any of the Michigan hockey players with the assumption that they are misogynistic. That’s what your article seems to be begetting.
Anecdotally, I believe many hockey players have great respect for women, which most likely stems from the great amount of effort their mothers put forth in getting them to where they are today. These women are referred to as “hockey moms” and this nickname symbolizes mothers that have dedicated their time and effort to getting their kids to practice and games at odd hours. And these hockey players realize this. Now back to your article.
It seems to me that Ms. Trubiano is using this story more as impugnation than education. In fact, basically forcing someone to have to apologize to her is not educational at all and does not lead to heart-felt changes in attitude. It usually leads to the exact opposite. Someone basically demanding an apology in order to educate is the height of condescension. Ms. Trubiano’s knowledge of human nature seems to be quite modest in this respect.
Furthermore, anyone who has played sports knows that trash talk is often part of the game. With your coverage of Michigan hockey, you should be well aware of the “you suck” chant that gets forcefully yelled at the opposition’s goalie. The goal (no pun intended), of course, is to get under the other person’s skin. In the case of Ms. Trubiano, mission accomplished. Whoever said this, if it was said at all, got her into an emotional state that is not conducive to playing sports. Again, that’s part of the game. Players are often called whiners, babies, and much much worse, and told “they suck” so often that the sport would be riddled with requests for apologies if people let it get to them or made them emotional. The fact that she’s a head coach now and has to deal with young players who need to be in control of their emotions makes me concerned.
You indicate that you have admiration for Ms. Trubiano for sharing this story. And I would too, if Ms. Trubiano had shared this story in the 70’s. However, in today’s world, she’s more likely to get condolences and admiration (as in your article) for sharing a story like this that claims she’s a victim.
I’m amazed at your indication that misogyny is so ingrained in the sport that when Gary Bettman indicates that an incident is not typical of NHL players, you dismiss it out of hand by indicating that it is simply denial. People like you were also very quick to extrapolate stories about Duke Lacrosse or UVA fraternities into widespread claims of severe abuse by specific identities and that the alleged actions that were proven false seem to be happening everywhere and are ingrained. I’m not saying that Ms. Trubiano’s story is in the same category as Duke Lacrosse or the UVA stories, but perhaps we might want to have some perspective here before cursing an entire sport based on two stories.
I could write more but I hope I’ve written enough to hopefully help educate you (sorry…couldn’t resist). I do like your blog Sam but this isn’t really about hockey but is about something else entirely.